Are Leaders Born or Made?

This question is one that is addressed quite often in leadership literature. More often than not, writers come down on the latter rather than the former; after all, they are trying to sell books for people to become a leader, so that makes sense. While we are all challenged to grow in all endeavors of life (2 Peter 3:18), we cannot overlook the fact that God often chooses people of obscurity to do his greatest works. Moses was the son of a Hebrew slave who had to leave Egypt because he killed a man. David was a mere shepherd on the Bethlehem hillsides. Several of the apostles were fishermen. Though they were from very diverse and humble backgrounds, when infused with the grace of God, they literally became world-changers.

Rather than thinking in terms of either/or, perhaps we should look at this tension as both/and. 1 Thessalonians 5:24 reminds us, “He who calls you is faithful; he will surely do it.” In other words, whatever level of leadership God calls us to, He will give us the grace to fulfill that role, whether it is a husband or wife, father or mother, elder or deacon, business owner or shift supervisor. Yet, as stated earlier, we are also called to grow in the grace of leadership.

Too many parents struggle to carry too much responsibility in raising their children. In no way am I suggesting that we take a laissez-faire approach to parenting. God forbid! We are obviously called to instruct our children (Proverbs 6:22; Proverbs 13:1). More importantly, we are to be living examples of obedience so that they can observe what that looks like (Proverbs 23:26). What I am saying is the same thing that Paul said in 1 Corinthians 15:10:

But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace toward me was not in vain. On the contrary, I worked harder than any of them, though it was not I, but the grace of God that is with me. – 1 Corinthians 15:10, 11

Whatever success our children enjoy, and we enjoy as parents, is first and foremost the result of the grace of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Even all the effort that we expend toward that end is a manifestation of His grace. Therefore, as much as we desire and work to train our children to have good people skills so they will be able leaders, it is all incumbent on us crying out to God for His presence in our homeschooling journey.

This month we are praying and fasting for God’s grace to raise our children to be able to relate to others on meaningful levels, whether that is serving through submission or serving through leading.

1. Pray that our children will genuinely love mankind and be concerned for their spiritual and physical welfare.
   • That there may be no division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another. – 1 Corinthians 12:25
   • Whoever oppresses a poor man insults his Maker, but he who is generous to the needy honors him. – Proverbs 14:31
   • If a brother or sister is poorly clothed and lacking in daily food, and one of you says to them, “Go in peace, be warmed and filled,” without giving them the things needed for the body, what good is that? So also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead. – James 2:15-17
2. Pray that our children will have favor from God and man.
   • And Jesus increased in wisdom and in stature and in favor with God and man. – Luke 2:52
   • And the Lord said to Moses, “This very thing that you have spoken I will do, for you have found favor in my sight, and I know you by name.”– Exodus 33:17
3. Pray that our children will understand the tension between humility and assertiveness when dealing with others.
   • Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count other more significant than yourselves. – Philippians 2:3
   • He began to speak boldly in the synagogue, but when Priscilla and Aquila heard him, they took him aside and explained to him the way of God more accurately. – Acts 18:26
4. Pray that our children will not fall prey to showing partiality but will treat all men equally.
   • I will not show partiality to any man or use flattery toward any person. – Job 32:21
   • My brothers, show no partiality as you hold the faith in our Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord of glory. – James 2:1
5. Pray that God will grace our children with a spirit of empathy toward others.
   • Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. – Romans 12:15
6. Pray that our children will be able to read people to know how to best serve and lead them.
   • As in water face reflects face, so the heart of man reflects the man. – Proverbs 27:19
   • The eye is the lamp of the body. So, if your eye is healthy, your whole body will be full of light. – Matthew 6:22
7. Pray that our children will always treat others with kindness and compassion.
   • Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience. –Colossians 3:12
   • Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. – Ephesians 4:32
8. Pray that our children will be good listeners as well as speakers.
   • Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger. – James 1:19
   • Oil and perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel. – Proverbs 27:9
9. Pray that our private lives will precede our public appearance, so the persona we show in public will be who we really are.
   • But as he who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct. – 1 Peter 1:15
10. Pray that each of us will look to God’s grace to change our hearts or the hearts of our children rather than trying to change them legalistically from the inside out.
    • For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people, training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age. – Titus 2:11
    • And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. And I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. –Proverbs 36:26